Woke up feeling down today. It happens, I know. I suppose everyone has woken up with the blues — even when it is not a rainy Monday.
Luckily, I was by myself this morning. (Hubby was out at a meeting and it was too early for the caretaker.) So, I had time to mope around if I so desired. But moping is not my style. I do not like it in others and, certainly, not in myself. Life offers too few opportunities to waste any days in a sulk, especially since my teenage years are in my dusty past.
Sitting down on the couch with a cup of coffee in my hand, I decided to take a dose of my own medicine (i.e., reroute the day's thought pathway). As I sipped the hot brew, I made a mental list of five things for which I am grateful. Immediately, the list was completed: husband, daughter, family, friends, church, caretaker, and Jesus. (Okay, more than five.) As soon as I finished this list, my mind turned to others. I prayed for: Nathaniel, a young man courageously facing aggressive brain cancer; a little girl with unspecified health issues; my daughter, Shannen, and her family; my friend, Jim, who lives with the residue effects of a stroke and his wife; and for my friend's, Joyce's, daughter and grandchildren. Another short list that sparked a longer time outside of myself and with my God.
Now, these actions did not magically remove the unwanted melancholy. In fact, the only action that was intended to be "medicine" for the doldrums was taking time to enumerate things for which I am grateful (which happened to be people and not things at all). However, that first decision turned out to be good medicine: a positive action in spite of the feeling. One small action that turned things around, like a light switch that can flood a room with light in the middle of the night.
I believe that being bold and facing life with honesty and faith can produce changes in our life's journey. Forcing myself out of my personal comfort zone and admitting to you, my companion, about these unwanted, unpleasant feelings is generating a psychological change. The more time I spent this morning focusing on matters outside of myself, the more I felt the doldrums retreat.
Happiness is elusive. For me, I have found that the more I stop focusing on me, the happier I am. I am not advocating that you deny yourself to the point of harm. There is a balance. Taking care of yourself is a healthy behavior. Although, in today's world, we often advocate “if it feels good, do it.” The delusory philosophy that self-satisfaction is attainable through self-gratification has proven to fail the disciples of hedonism. Scientific studies have shown that the more you have, the more you want. Personal gratification and desires are insatiable. My advice: take time thinking, caring and doing for others. Spend time outside of yourself.
Practical steps to happiness:
Practical steps to happiness:
- Be good to others;
- Be grateful;
- Exert self-control;
- Practice; practice; practice;
- Live a moral, ethical life;
- Love everyone (friends and foes);
- Love with abandon.
